Getaway
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Sofia Capettini The 2021 Purity Test: Work From Home Edition
Welcome to the 2021 Purity Test. This past year has been referred to as “unprecedented times,” but there is one…
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Kason Jenney ate my homework
So like, you know how Kason Jenney ran away with Bill 69 and ate it? He ran to my house.…
Read More » - Christina Varvis
Animal control called after Kason Jenney steals Bill 69 and eats it
Animal control was called on December 21 after Kason Jenney bolted out of the Legislature with Bill 69 in his…
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I actually enjoy the government spying on me
Please stop bullying the government for spying on us. I like that they spy on us. It’s comforting. I feel……
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SU executives propose new garbage police program
In light of growing concerns about the environment, Students’ Union executives have brought forward an intriguing new idea. They have…
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Top 5: Reasons you should go fuck yourself
5. You’re an asshole. You’re just a massive piece of shit and I want you to go fuck yourself. 4.…
Read More » - Helen Zhang
Exploring Edmonton: Dent/Pharm Construction Site
Editor’s Note (12/18/2019, 4:15 p.m.): This article is intended to be a satirical version of The Gateway’s ongoing column “Exploring…
Read More » - Rosty Soroka
SU holds Town Hall on when to have the real Town Hall
In an attempt to maximize student engagement in regards to organizing the next student-led strike, Students’ Union President Abra Cadabra announced…
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I’m a proud gamerphobe and you should be too
If you’re anything like me, you enjoy a little peace and quiet. A little bit of normalcy. You like to…
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Marble Pedestal: Me
Some people say there are a lot of great people in this world. This is not true. If we’re talking…
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