Advice

Advice Column: Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland

Good time management wins the race

“Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall be too late!” – Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland

I struggle with time management and serious procrastination. What are your biggest tips to get motivated to start and stay on task as well as managing time better?

~ The White Rabbit

My good Rabbit,

Before I became a refined and exquisite hedgehog of sensibility, I too was like you — never starting projects, taking on too many tasks at once, and always falling behind. 

So how have I become such a well put-together hedgehog? My biggest motivator, young lagomorph, was success. Did I want to stay in the rabble? Or did I want to be able to spend time with other hedgehogs of taste at the finest restaurants, the loveliest cafes, and the theatre? The answer should be obvious to you, my dear friend. Focus on the success. Focus on the fear deep within your heart that keeps you up at night, the fear that you will never make it. Use that fear as energy to finish all those tasks. It is a perfectly healthy way to live — I mean, look at me! Have you ever seen such a distinguished hedgehog with such shiny quills? 

As for staying on task, this is what I have to say. Brew a strong pot of tea — wait, no, scratch that. Brew the strongest pot of tea known to animal-kind, and down a cup each time your mind begins to wander. Are you running out? Make another pot. Keep going until you run out of things to do. If you do all of your tasks in one fell swoop, you can spend the rest of the week listening to the simply sublime sounds of Berlioz and conversing about them with your high-browed acquaintances. The vibration that comes with the caffeine is simply an added bonus. 

~ Dr. Hedgehog 

Dear Rabbit,

Bruh, this is what you hop-hop-hopped into my mud pen for? Ugh. Rabbits. So simple. The answer is obvious: stop punishing yourself and start rewarding yourself.

I, for one, love rewards. I reward myself with naps, cheese, and chocolate covered macadamia nuts. What’s your vibe, man? Gummy bears? Carrots? Bubble baths? Come on dude, it’s stupid to punish yourself with the stress of leaving everything to the last minute when you could have been reaping in rewards the whole time. No wonder your hair is all white.

Make a checklist. You know how to do that, right? Order them by importance and deadline or split up complex tasks into steps. Finish a task, get a carrot. A hint? Hop over to Wonderland Library and learn a bit about behaviour modification. You just gotta quit clowning around with procrastination. 

For example, I just helped out a few idiots so I get a mud roll. Now I’m incentivized to keep helping out the rest of the circus. Make sense? Close the gate on your way out.

~ Pliny the Pig


Want to ask Dr. Hedgehog and Pliny the Pig for their takes on your plights? Send in your letter here!

Back to top button