Student-organized orgy coming soon for U of A community

The rumours are true: there’s going to be an orgy for University of Alberta students..

The location and date of the “sexual mixer” is still tentative, but it will be held on November 13 at one of three tentative locations. It’s open to any student of the U of A, as long as they are willing to be screened by organizers.

Gender and sexuality ratios will be kept as close to equal as possible, to make sure nobody feels outnumbered or left out. The group is sex-positive, and said they are accepting of anyone on the gender and sexuality spectra to attend. It’s challenging to keep a balance, but keeping relatively equal numbers from all groups is important for the group’s comfort, U of A student and organizer Matthew James Hardy said.

“This way they can actually explore and not feel suppressed,” he said.

Despite the popular view that only males want to participate in group sex, there’s been equal anonymous interest from both men and women. “Slut-shaming” culture tends to make women more hesitant, but there are indeed confirmed female attendees for November’s event. There has also been interest from LGBT individuals as well, Hardy said.

“I think there’s a significant number of people out there with an interest in group sex,” Hardy said. “They just never really take the plunge.”

All levels of experience are welcome; the orgy is open to anyone who wishes to explore their fantasies in that context, he said.

The fun and thrill that comes with seeing other couples enjoying themselves in group sex can strengthen one’s own relationship, Hardy said. There’s also a greater confidence that comes after expressing oneself naked in the presence of strangers, he said. Hardy is experienced with group sex, so he will act as a moderator to make sure rules are respected.

Hardy added that orgy is not a free-for-all; no one has to interact if they don’t want to. Guidelines for etiquette, consent, and safety must be followed.

Hardy said he is willing to be the face of the group to help others express themselves without having to face any judgement. Participants themselves can stay anonymous and only need to reveal their names to Hardy himself for security purposes. Names will remain confidential and are mainly used for the screening process, which ensures participants aren’t random people who will show up and make others feel uncomfortable, Hardy said. Within the orgy, attendees can remain anonymous or disclose a fake name. Identity security will be taken very seriously, he said.

“Discretion is my number one concern,” he said. “I want to give (participants) a safe environment to express themselves in that regard and not have to worry about any peering eyes.”

Regarding STIs, there’s no way to completely know if an individual is negative since tests quickly become outdated, so Hardy is not requiring participants to get tested. They are encouraged to bring and use barrier contraceptives however. Condoms will also be supplied.

Orgy-goers can bring partners from within or outside the U of A, as long as these partners are also screened. The idea is to make sure everyone is as comfortable as possible — if bringing a friend helps, all the better, Hardy said.

The orgy will start at around 7 p.m. and end around midnight. It’s currently undecided whether alcohol will be permitted and full details will be up to the finalized in the upcoming weeks. Also undecided is the location, which will be either a Fantasyland hotel room, the local lifestyle club 4-Play, or the host’s own home. Details will be finalized closer to the date to get the most input from participants.

Hardy is open to answering questions from anyone interested. He can be contacted on Facebook or as “Duraflame” on fetlife.com in the group UAlberta Kink.

The idea in the end is to just help people express themselves in a safe environment, Hardy said.

“I don’t like the idea of having to hide what you enjoy just because someone else may find it distasteful,” he said.

Hardy’s Orgy Guidelines

1. Safe environment — Consent must be given for any interaction: participants are not to touch or initiate without first reviving explicit permission. Flirting is not always a sign they’re interested in anything beyond the verbal exchange. Coercion is not considered consent, and is thereby prohibited.

2. Etiquette — This orgy in particular will be accepting to all types and whatever part of the sexual spectrum they may consider themselves on. Nobody has to interact if they’re not interested or comfortable, but basic etiquette expects participants to decline if asked to interact. To join a particular part of the orgy, participants must ask permission. This allows things to run more smoothly. Overt aggression can result in expulsion from the orgy

3. Cleanliness — Wipe up any bodily fluids, and dispose of any contraceptives. Participants are guests, and should behave as such.