Top 5: Songs that aren’t about Christmas but sound like they could be

There are a few topics you should always steer clear of if you want to remain in the realm of polite conversation. Politics and religion are the classics, the wetness of water is another definite no-no, and unless you want to start an argument of nuclear proportions, you had best not bring up when you think it’s ok to start listening to Christmas music.

Some people start turning up Mariah Carey right after the last trick-or-treater leaves their doorstep, while traditionalists will wait for December 1st and not a moment sooner. Weirdos will say that you can’t play Christmas music until after the first snowfall, which in Edmonton could be anytime between August 1st and December 31st.

Maybe you are someone who likes to start listening to Christmas music sooner rather than later. In that case, I thought that I would help you keep the peace with the Scrooges in your life and I put together a list of the top five songs that technically aren’t about Christmas, but still sound like they could be. 

1. “Easily” by Bruno Major

You could add just about any Bruno Major song to a Christmas playlist and nobody would notice (or complain), but none of them pass the holiday vibe check quite like “Easily”. The lyrics have all of the impending heartbreak of a holiday classic, minus the predatory undertones. The simple instrumental and stripped-down vocals make “Easily” perfect for those cozy December nights spent curled up beside the fire, reflecting on the year that was, quietly sobbing about the one that got away.

2. “Halftime” by Nas

Most people remember Illmatic as Nas’ stunning lyrical debut, but for me, it will always be the first time I heard sleigh bells sampled unironically on a rap album. Like most tracks on Illmatic, “Halftime” is an odyssey through Nas’ New York, but the jangling sleigh bells in the background always keep me waiting for the other stocking to drop and for the track to reveal itself as a yuletide anthem. If Die Hard was a rap song it would be “Halftime”, and just like Die Hard, there’s only one answer to the question of whether it is genuine Christmas content or some sort of holiday-themed other. Yes, yes it is.

3. “Kalinka”

Russian war music might not exactly put you in the holiday spirit, but if you can’t make it to the North Pole then you might as well settle for the gulag, amirite?

Jokes aside, “Kalinka” is a famous Russian folk song written in 1860 by Russian composer Ivan Larionov, but if you’re like me and don’t know enough Russian to understand a word that’s being said, let the rising vocals, quickening strings, and bellowing arias whip you into a holiday frenzy. Instead of hanging up your Christmas lights to the tune of some mellow Christmas ballad this year, put on “Kalinka”. I guarantee that you’ll be pounding your chest and up that shaky aluminium ladder so fast that you’ll barely have enough time to shed a tear for Mother Russia.

4. “thank u, next” by Ariana Grande

Songs that aren’t about Christmas that drop during the holidays are always hard to classify, and with a music video that was released on November 30, 2018, “thank u, next” falls firmly in that category. The single itself is a passive aggressive ta-ta aimed at Pete Davidson, Big Sean, and any other hapless man who has ever crossed Ariana Grande, so it’s safe to say this is very much not a Christmas song. That said, the glittery synth-pop sounds are the perfect way to kick off a pop-infused Christmas playlist, and the fact that Ariana and co. wear Mrs. Claus costumes in the music video makes this an automatic entry.

5. “Haven’t Met You Yet” by Michael Bublé

Is it even possible to talk about the holidays without mentioning Michael Bublé? I could easily say that “Haven’t Met You Yet” isn’t a Christmas song, but that’s like saying tomatoes aren’t vegetables — sure the label might say one thing, but deep down, we all know the truth. There’s a reason why Michael Bublé is our generation’s undisputed King of Yuletide, and it’s because his voice was built for the holidays. In fact, Michael Bublé is so synonymous with the holidays that his mere presence almost feels like a sign that Christmas is around the corner. Oh wait, it actually is.