Getaway
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D.I ETS announces there’s only one bus route now and we all have to share it
All bus routes in Edmonton will be amalgamated into one single route under a new plan announced by Edmonton Transit…
Read More » - Christina Varvis
Campus Saint-Jean launches a successful revolution
Vivre la revolution! Vivre Saint-Jean! This was no quiet revolution. Campus Saint-Jean has successfully overthrown their anglophone oppressors and established…
Read More » - Supplied
Gritty declared new international hate symbol
That’s right! You heard it here first, folks! Gritty, the new Philadelphia Flyers mascot, is now an international hate symbol.…
Read More » - Supplied
Week of Welcome is actually a religion, not a cult
Have you heard of our Lord and saviour, Guba? Week of Welcome (WoW) has released a statement clarifying that they…
Read More » - Kesia Dias
New strain of cancer originated in Lister, study finds
Lister Hall, known for trapping starry-eyed freshman in a tormented shithole that permanently smells of piss, is at the centre…
Read More » - Tori
Lister meal plan to be replaced by hunger games
The Board of Governors has approved a new program to quell the unrest (and further divide) among on-campus residents: The…
Read More » - Richard Bagan
Top 5 ways to respond to your high school friend who wants you to join their pyramid scheme
You haven’t talked to Brooklyn since the 10th grade. Hence, you are shocked when you receive a Facebook message at…
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President Turmip announces wall to be built on UAlberta-MacEwan border
If you’ve ever been irked by the presence of lower lifeforms on your campus, you might have to be irked…
Read More » - Diego PH
University’s energy system to include renewable resources like student anger, tears
In response to the structural deficit, the University of Alberta’s utilities group has developed a new system to relieve this…
Read More » - Oumar Salifou
Aramark’s new meal plan: “We’re literally gonna shove this shit down your sorry throats”
In response to numerous outcries from Lister residents regarding the new meal plan proposal, Aramark has introduced what they call…
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